Stay away from me… please

How. How? How!

How could you? You’ve been horrible to me. Really. I have enough sometimes, of being trapped in my feelings, guilty myself about the comfort easy life I’m living with you, because you don’t ask, you don’t talk, never want troubles, ever.

So easy…

I have to ignore as you do, all the doubts, all the thoughts, every time I dream my ghosts is ok, I just don’t have to bother you. All right then!

Lucky me.

Death anniversary I’m facing me and myself, you don’t ask, ever, about her, or about the baby, but.. the thing is you have enough.. of me, being so nervous these days, so nasty.

I pleased, please don’t disappoint me this way (again)!

You looked at me, murder sight, and you said the words I knew (but prayed other way):”Be careful not to disappoint Me too much!”.

I understood, ’cause I knew it, I’m the bad one. You don’t even try to understand, you only attack me back.

Doesn’t matter to me, I knew the man you are, I knew you are good, but forgive me, just forgive if I don’t want to see your face.

Dreaming in clouds

I don’t care about anything but my feelings today,
looking for a good place to rest in peace.

I lay down in the sand waiting for the wave
to catch my ticklish feet in freshness
to gently restore my tired soul in a touch.

Dreaming it’s free,
disenchantment’s the price.

thinking back and forward

as the sun rises his head, I have to think about my nightmares,

not going anywhere anymore, just laying as I stay.

words I had enough and more not spoken, and never to go.

whispers in my ears moving on, looking for the heart colder than ever.

as the glass crushes,my beat smashes my flesh and blood.

crying is a wasted water resource, I wasted enough, dry at all once.

my sight is lost in the far horizon line, always thinking there’s a better place for me.

Silence killer

Never ever live in silence.
Everybody can hurt you when you’re silent.
Scream out loud, let your life be an eternal cry.
Let everybody know your alive, moving in the time-line.
I hold you tight ’cause I can see your light,
you’re so beautiful I can’t express..
my feelings in your hand.

Running in circles

In circles I’m running
going where I don’t care

really smart to consider
all my life from the shore

wave by wave emotions
crush in a crushed devotion

I’m standing in the middle
of this pool of blood

where’s the victim gone?
look there, look better!

a hand’s rising high
no fair… it’s mine.

Positive

Every try I give,

I miss the target.

I’m still here,

so I’ll try again.

Soon or later

I’m sure enough,

I’ll be able once

to hit the mark.

On writing a novel… again!

Yes, of course I’m messing around.

Google+ and YouTube and all this stuff, I know I’ll change my mind, ’cause I’m not a chatty one, from time to time can happen, but my phone allergy is not so far from all this things.

But I can proudly say I wrote today, I’m going on and I amused myself with the story and it makes me hope for better.

I feel closer to my fantasy people  and I can focus better on their characters.

The point is to let the fantasy go without being childish.

You have to be mature enough to know that yes, it’s great to create places, stories from zero, but it’s easy, really easy to fall in a boring fairytale.Instead of a catchy novel.

So, my target is to be careful.

I surprised myself, I really did, when I found myself in some hot scenes, and I wrote them!

Keep on going, I really would like to share something soon or later.. we’ll see, it’s not in english.

Love and blessings to all of you

I love myself..I believe

I’m happy to be  me because I’m honest with myself, because I like my thoughts.

Sometimes I really keep me good company .

The thing is.. when someone’s always by your side no matter what, what you feel?

So, I’m grateful I ‘m still in one piece.

Look at me, I’ve been through some holes to hell!

I faced my fears, I’m still looking back from time to time, but what to do with something you never chose?

You don’t choose to lose someone, you don’t choose when the grim is going for a visit, it comes!

I’m on my feet and I’m in good company,I have love and I have to stop with these fears of loss.

I felt abandoned in my childhood, but to lose in these days that’s a different kettle of fish.

I’m fine, I have a dream, I need a project, everybody needs, to go on.

I’m writing every time I can and obviously it’s a hard thing to do, ’cause it’s like the universe notices it sending me distractions every minute.

I’m stubborn with this purpose, I’ll do it.

Don’t worry! I’m writing the story in italian, I know my english is good enough just to communicate, not to write really!

If a day, maybe, let me dream… It will score, maybe you’ll read it.

 

 

Never turn back

The one who leaves , leaves a presence ten times bigger than himself.

You have to be strong and look straight the way, never turn back, never.

His eyes will be so big and bright, ten times better than the real ones.

The way he smiled you’ll think was charming, in a way it never was.

So, leave the ghosts in peace and treat yourself right, as you’re here, now, flash and blood.

You’ve got to be your best friend ’cause no one in this life has been so close to you as you are .